I need some advice. Last month I took The Boy and The Girl to have their eyes tested. It turned out they both needed glasses. I bought two pairs and both kids were excited about them. The Girl is still excited about them but The Boy "hates them" and is refusing to wear them. He told me he won't wear them to school. (Oh, yes you will!) School starts in a few weeks and I feel bad for the kid! He is starting grade 5 and it must be hard to go back to school with glasses that you got during the summer. He has never showed such defiance before. He is usually very agreeable!
So these are the facts.
- He hates them.
- He will wear them.
The only thing I can think of to make this a little easier is let him start wearing them a couple weeks after school starts when it won't be such a big deal. I really have no other ideas. I would love to hear your advice. Any suggestions?
posted by BarbaraMG at Tuesday, August 22, 2006
12 Comments:
Just curious, but why does he hate them? Is it the frame? If so, can he choose another one? I started wearing glasses mid-way through High school and I never really had a problem with it. My g/f at the time picked out the frame and she felt it looked nice on me and that was all i needed to hear. Add to the fact that all of a sudden I could actually SEE made a huge difference.
My only advice is to find out the why, and tackle it.
Now if only I could find a place that will make custom clip ons like that one little kiosk in the mall near my old house. Sigh.
He doesn't like them because he is worried what everyone will think. Bah. Peer pressure. :(
I think the real issue is that he's feeling insecure. He needs to walk into that class room and OWN those glasses. Tell him to walk in as though he just got a tattoo. Like, "check my bad ass self out in these specs. They rock." Cause the second he walks in sheepishly, those little vultures will sense his insecurity and they will know what's causing it. When that happens, they will prove him right and pick at the soft spot. If he handles himself right, they will all wish they had glasses just like his.
Does he need glasses for nearsightedness or farsightedness?
Could he get away with wearing them just for certain activities (ie: reading, seeing the board)?
If he does need them all the time, I'm with Sharon. Too bad all the kids in the class can't have such cool glasses!
Superman wore glasses. Well in his Clark Kent persona.
I don't know the answer. Maybe you could hire some grade 5 girls to maul him or something, tee,hee..
I started wearing glasses in grade 5 as well and remember it being a pain for sports b/c they would fog up. I got contacts as soon as I could (grade 8). Luckily some of my friends had glasses though so I wasn't the "odd man out". Will any of his peers have glasses? If so, that will definitely help. If not, that which does not kill us only makes us stronger but it's so nice to see you being sensitive to the issue. You must be a great mom!
I have no suggestions, but am looking for the answer, since my 4th grader is probably going to need them at some point this year. OY.
Unfortunatly, it's just a part of life. Kids are cruel, and being different is never fun. But in the end, he'll wear them cause he needs to and more often then not, something like glasses isn't something really noticed or made a big deal of these days. Ask him about people he knows that wears glasses and his feelings about them. It might just surprise him how many people actually wear them that he never noticed before.
One bit of advice I do have that might be worth something is to get him the frames that you can bend. I used to go through glasses twice a year until I got those, and now i've had the same frame since 1997. I'd like to say it's because i've gotten more careful, but unfortunatly nothing could be further from the truth!
I think the break him in gently approach is the way to go. I too did the same thing when I got glasses at a young age. I thought they made me look goofy and didn't want my classmates to see me in them. Eventually I was convinced that other people wore them and that they would help me and I finally put them on. The fact that I was getting fewer and fewer prevliges may have help a little also. Good luck.
I agree with sharron. Just OWN the Cool specs.
This is a tough one. As a parent you should be able to "force" him, but, from experience as a kid who did not want to wear her glasses - as soon as he is out of your sight, he won't wear them. (I even "accidentally" threw mine in the cafeteria trash. LOL.)
Is he responsible enough for contacts? Are there any famous people he really admires? You could find pics of them wearing glasses?
That sucks that he's worried about what the other kids will think/say about him. An age old problem! :P
My kids all wore glasses since they were little, but it was specially hard on my son, he had myopia (crossed eyes), so he needed to wear bifocals.
There are a lot of kids that need glasses, unfortunately some kids can be cruel and will pick on kids with glasses.
I wish I could give some advice, but it was so long ago now since my kids went through that, my son is 24 now, that I can't recall if they had a problem with it or not.
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