This is how I feel tonight. I am so tired! I came home and sat down and haven't moved. Some days I don't like being a single mom working full time. I admit I am envious of moms that get to stay home. I work because I have to, not by choice. When I get home I have as many meals to make, notices to sign and homework as a stay at home mom. All the laundry, dusting, vacuuming and cleaning doesn't get done until I get home. I am jealous of the stay at home moms chatting in the school parking lot over coffee in the morning when I drop off the kids and go off to work. I am resentful when stay at home parents don't understand why I don't volunteer at the school. The fact is I would love to be volunteering!
My kids get me at my worst time of the day. When I see them after work I am too tired to even sit down for a meal most nights. I am always running around doing laundry, cleaning the house and preparing for the next day. (And trust me when I say that I let a lot of housework go just so I can spend time with my kids.)
I do get the kids to help. At 8 & 10 they make their lunches for school, get their clothes out for the next day, empty the dishwasher, sweep the floors and do other household chores. Some days I feel like I am not letting them have a childhood by making them work.
I don't like envy and jealousy. They are ugly characteristics. I will feel better in a day or two. But right now I don't have a solution for my problem.
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I just realized something. First I felt horrified then I felt awful! Laura, my dear sweet blogging friend, I apologize for not having you in my blog roll! It was a total oversight on my part because I already have a This is Me. I thought I added you long ago! I love you and I am so sorry if I have hurt your feelings. I have now added you to the top of my blog roll and there you shall remain forever. Know that you are one of my most favourite blogging friends. (((hugs)))
posted by BarbaraMG at Thursday, October 19, 2006
5 Comments:
I so know what you mean.
As a teacher, I get to spend time with those SAHMs of which you speak, and they drive me NUTS!
Right now, I have a mom who walks her daughter to the classroom door at 9:00, is standing outside the classroom door at 12:00, walks her daughter back to the door at 1:00, and - you guessed it - is once again standing outside the door at 3:30.
The aforementioned daughter is in the fifth grade!
I think she is quite capable of walking to school - and if not that, at least into the school - by herself.
BTW - my boys - aged 12, 9, and 5 - all have chores, and I think it's the best thing for them. Don't feel guilty about giving your children a work ethic. I've had to deal with way too many kids who have no idea what work is.
Good luck!
I hear ya. When I take Jake to pre-school in the morning, sometimes I'll sit in the parking lot and watch some of the other moms. They drive up in these big, fancy SUV's, wearing yoga clothes, and you just KNOW they're not heading off to work. Grrrrr...
As for chores, I think they're a good thing. I had to do chores when I was small, and I think I turned out a whole lot better than some of my friends' older kids, who never had to lift a finger at home. These kids kinda scare me, cuz they just seem so unprepared for real life, and unappreciative of what moms do to make a household run!
Number one: ((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))
Number two: (((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))
Number three: I never noticed my name was not on the blogroll list because I subscribe to you via bloglines. So I was never hurt in anyway. And it would be a bit silly if I went around blogs thinking oh how come I'm not number one on this one or that one's blogroll. Get the picture? lol Honey don't sweat it!!
Number four: Chores are good!
Number five: where's that Joy Box? (probably too tired to go scrounge it up right? lol)
Number six: You are doing the best damn job you can do as a mom. Now your kids may not be able to tell you, but they'll let you know when the time comes!!
Number seven: Cut yourself some slack woman!!
Number eight: I love you!! <3
Barbara I have a unique view of this as I have been both the single working mom and the stay at home mom. Although because of depression issues and going to school I still didn't have time for yoga!!! Or volunteering in classrooms! I guess I never paid attention to that either way. I was always too busy doing laundry wether I worked or not, being a single mom is just stressful and lonely anyway you put it unless your ex is really really rich and you dont' have to work and can afford a housekeeper. Wouldn't it be wonderful if all moms could focus one hundred percent of their time and energy into the kids. Heh, we'd have to go back to living in caves for that. And even then I don't think it was possible. Women just carry most of the work load period. No matter what. Why, because we are stronger. There are a few single fathers out there doing it too and I gotta give them credit.
Chores are not a bad thing at all, my kids all do chores and I believe it is good for them. None of us would have learned how to do any of those things if we hadn't had chores when growing up. I think its great for kids to have chores and responsibilities. The world is not a kind place and preparing them for it doesn't make them less kids now. You are loved!!
I know, sometimes I run out of steam too. It's never-ending. Have a hot bath. You need a little me-time.
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