Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Thursday, June 30, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Happy 138th Birthday Canada!
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

On My Yearly Review at Work
~
YAY! YAY ! YAY!
That time of year that we all dread. My yearly review was today. I had refused to get worked up about it because the boss had let me know the week prior that I was doing well. It went better than well, it went great! I am doing above average work in most areas and they are looking to be able to eventually branch me out into other departments. They are very pleased with my effort and quality of work and that I show initiative and a great attitude. That said I was given a very good raise that I need now that the ex is not paying much child support. I am so happy! Yay!

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Waking up 13 Minutes Before a Staff Meeting
~
Let me tell you outright. I am a woman of few talents. I can't sing, play an instrument or dance. I have very poor athletic skills. I am intelligent but not Mensa material. I am not beautiful nor can I recite poetry. There is one thing I can do and damn it, I am proud of it. I can get ready really, really fast. Not just fast but unbelievably fast. This morning I woke up 7:47 and freaked out. (The clock was supposed to be set for 6:47.) I did a double take and grabbed my watch to make sure the time I was looking at was the correct. It was. I woke my kids, got dressed, told the kids to get dressed, went to the bathroom, did my make-up, grabbed my shoes, through a lunch for myself in my bag, grabbed my wallet and keys and ran out the door with my kids. Talked to lonely old neighbor (because she is so sweet) for about 10 seconds, got in the car and did an illegal turn onto the highway, drove kids to daycare and dropped them off, floored it because kids were no longer in vehicle. I then drove 75 in a 50 zone the rest of the way to work and arrived at 8:02. That is 15 minutes people! My daycare is about 7 minutes away and my work another 10 minutes from there. Now tell me. I am not the fastest get readier person you have ever heard ot what? (Applause here.)
This is what it sounded like at my house this morning.
~~~~~
On Working on My Day Off...Again!
~
Just because it pisses me off I am letting you know I have to work on my day off again this week! It is pissing me off because I am seeming to work on my days off more than I actaully have the day off! Damn!

Monday, June 27, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On My Tiny Dancer
~
I have my own Tiny Dancer. She is 7 and the smallest in her class. Even though I held her back from starting kindergarten an extra year and is almost a whole year younger than her friends she is still the tiniest! After she was born she was diagnosed with a genetic disease that has left her with low muscle tone and a very slight frame. She tires easily does not have the same stamina as other children her age. We have spent many, many hours in physiotherapy. Tonight she had her Highland Dancing Awards and won the award for Most Promising Dancer! And she is good. Really good! Her teacher has told me that she has seen a natural ability and thinks if she stays with it The Girl will be able to go far with it. I am so proud of her. She got her first trophy and is very excited!
~~~~~
On How the Diet is Going
~
Let's just say it's not. It really isn't a "diet" per se but more of getting back to a more active lifestyle. I already eat fairly well, though the last few weeks I have eaten about 94 hotdogs. I did not do an workout last week because I was feeling so lousy. So anyway, I am at the same place I started!
~~~~~~
On Bumper Stickers
~
What the hell would possess someone to take a bright yellow sticker over a foot long and slap it on a brand new 2005 car? Why would someone decrease the value of their car with a bumper sticker? I can understand if you drive a piece of shit like I do. My car is almost an antique! It is dented and scratched and a bumper sticker adds to the overall look of junkiness. But on a new car? Makes no sense to me! If you have ever put a bumper sticker on a brand new car please tell me your reasoning.
~~~~~
On Snoopy Happy Hopping
~
I have now added my beloved Snoopy to my posts. I just love the little guy hopping and looking so joyous! Hard to not smile just a teeny bit when I see him. Makes me want to skip wherever he is going right along with him! I think he is going to see Woodstock! Where do you think he is headed? (Rude comments will be deleted!)

Sunday, June 26, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Creative Juices Dehydrated
~
New look to blog. This is all I can come up with for now. Will work on a different one this week. Hope you all had a nice weekend!

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Prayers Greatly Appreciated.
~
Went to see my mom today and she is the sickest I have seen her since she was diagnosed with cancer. The radiation treatments are on the top part of her abdomen and making her vomit continuously and have severe diarrhea. Her spirits are very low. I am usually the one to cheer her up at least a little but today she was saying she just wants to die. I really didn't know what to do for her. I did go and buy her some new cotton sheets and nighties because she had been sleeping in flannel bed sheets. Other than that I felt helpless. She has 3 weeks left of daily radiation so it is not going to be over soon.
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

On a Great Idea
~
Blogger is now able to host it's own photo's and images. That is so much easier!

~

On Too Much Complaining
~
I really have been lately haven't I? Bitching about every subject under the sun. Not sure why. I guess when I am feeling physically ill it takes over my thoughts as well.
~~~~
On Weird Dreams
~
What is up with this dream analyzing people? I have been having dreams that I have been doing a 19 year old! (I"m 34) This guy is totally hot and we connect in every way. But 19? Hmmm.
~~~~
On Too Much Pink
~
I am again unsatisfied with the look of this blog. Too pink. You will be seeing a new look again soon.

Friday, June 24, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On...I Don't Know
~
Was off today and spent way too much money on supplies to make the summer program I am forcing on my kids fun. One thing I bought was a CD that helps them learn the times tables. The kids love it. I hate it. The woman has a voice like Janice from Friends. It is like nails on a chalkboard! I want to find a way to play a clip because you need to hear for yourself how horribly awful it is. (Found a sample online. Go here and click on any of the song choices. The one about the number 9 is a good example.)
I still have a cold/flu thingy going on but choose to ignore it so the kids and I could do something together today. We went to see the goats on the roof! Yay! On the drive home I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open! It was worth it though. We had fun.
Now I am sitting here all sweaty and clammy with my nose running. I think it is time to go to the pharmacy and get some cold medicine to put me out of my misery.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Low-fat Muffins
~
I worked today on my day off again but managed to get off early. I am still not %100 healthy but definitely improved. Another day or two I am sure I will be back to normal.
First day for the kids at daycare and I can see I chose the right daycare. Why? This is around the corner and on my way to work! Granted I can drive in any direction in this city and hit a Tim Horton's but this one is really close.
I actually have a beef with Tim Horton's. They have changed their low-fat muffin recipe from bran to this white flour crap. I don't eat many products that are made from white flour. I gave it up about a year ago and replaced it for whole-wheat products. I now find white pasta, breads, crackers etc awful. So anyway, they have now made my favourite low-fat bran cranberry muffins into something I won't eat. I even wrote a letter of complaint to the website. They wrote back and told me they would not be changing them back. Is it just me or does it seem ridiculous that they would take something that people obviously buy because they are health-conscious and make it less healthy?

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Feeling Sad...and Still Sick
~
School is out for another year and as always I am sad. I feel like my kids life is moving faster than I am. I want to have more time with them but work takes a great deal of my time. Tomorrow is supposed to be my day off but as most of you know I end up working my days off. I am a single mom living on very little money. I need to work as much as I can.
The Boy and Girl had their report cards today and both did well but The Boy needs to work on math. He needs to work a lot. When I am feeling better I will come up with a program that he will work on in the summer where he can work on the basics. I am also going to enroll both kids in the Summer Reading Program. I will have them do short book reports on the books they read. Don't give me a hard time about this because one, the ability to learn is a gift and we should embrace it. Two, both kids need to work on some areas and spend more than enough time playing and watching TV. Trust me. They will spend probably 10 hours watching TV this summer for every 1 hour of the "homework" I will have them do. Third, I don't want to be given a hard time because I feel guilty already. What kind of mother makes her children do math and book reports during the summer?

And I am still sick. I have been going to work but I am weak and achy still. Just want to sleep.
Thanks for reading my depressing post. Will be back on track soon I hope!

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On the Last Day of School
~
That dreaded day has come. Tomorrow is the last day of school. It is always a very emotional day for me. Not because I am dreading the summer but because my babies are growing so fast. I feel like I have blinked and they were 9 & 7. So many parents hate the summer because they don't want their kids around for over 2 months. I love the summer because I get to spend more time with my kids. They are the light in my life.
This evening was there end of year ceremonies. And I cried. I am so proud of them. My daughter read a little story and my son sang a song. I wish I could have frozen that moment in time. There are so many moments I wish I could have frozen in time. As I watched them tears ran down my cheeks and it hurt. Oh, but such a precious hurt.
~~~
On Cutting and Gluing
~
Went to work sick and came home early. My boss took compassion on my germy self and let me cut out little slips of paper all morning long. A job my 7 year old would have done well. And this leads me to a little known secret about me. I can't cut in a straight line! It always ends up all jaggedy and crooked. If I cut out a rectangle it ends up in a parallelogram. It is embarrassing to be 34 and still not able to do a task that you need to do to graduate kindergarten.
Anyway, I am home and going to get into my pajamas and watch afternoon television. Wonder if anything worth watching is on?

Monday, June 20, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Falling Asleep at 4:30 in the Afternoon
~
I came home from work early because I was basically sitting there and staring off into space. I was feeling like crap so I asked the boss if I could go home early. After I go home I read about 3 blogs and realized I needed to go sleep. I walked the 10 feet to the sofa and crashed. Still tired. The Girl also fell asleep. She is sick too.
Now I am awake and need to make supper. Maybe I should just do the cereal thing tonight.
I am tired again. Must rest.
One Last Question.
Why does the word "blog" come up when I do a spell check with blogger. Isn't it about time to add it?

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Germs
~
I thought if I ignored and didn't mention the fact I have not felt well the last 2 days I would have not have become really sick. I thought if I took it easy the last 2 days and rested (neglecting my workout) I would have avoided getting really sick. Well I was wrong! Wrong! Stupid germs!Today this set of germs has hit me full force and I feel like garbage. I can barely swallow, my stomach is upset, I ache everywhere and I am very tired. And here is the best part. I have to take The Girl to her year end dance recital which is outside. I don't have the energy to stand up never mind going to a dance recital.
OK, here is where you feel sorry for me. Bring it on because nobody else will. Thanks in advance.

~~
Update
Wimpy me made it through. I love seeing my daughter dance so I am glad I went. It would take a lot more than the flu to prevent me from seeing her perform. Seeing her dance always makes me cry. I am so proud of her! She is very good! I am home now. Stopped and had dinner out because I knew I had to feed the kidlets and I certainly was not about to come home and cook! Now I am going to go lay on the sofa and not move until bedtime! Thanks for your nice comments.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On a Single Girl's Night on the Town
~
This evening my kids are spending the night at their dad's. I have the place to myself and a night to go out and do whatever I want! What shall it be? The pub? A singles bar? The possibilities were endless. Well, not really. I am not much of a drinker and I am not the singles bar type. So I got in my car and headed to Chapters. I love reading and am always in search of a good book. (I prefer non-fiction.) I drive to the other side of town anticipating an hour or two of just browsing. I was disappointed to find out they had closed at 6:00. ~sigh~ So I head to Wal-Mart. I bought moisturizer, a cat harness for the unruly one, a crinkly bag for the unruly one to play in, a bottle of school glue and 3 pairs of white tights for The Girl's dancing. I got home and wrestled the cat to put on his harness. Had a bath. And then I thought to myself, "Damn I am boring."
~
If you are still reading at this point look at what the back of the crinkly bag said. Who writes this stuff? And he does he NOT relax in crinkly bag! He goes inside and the slightest crinkle sound sends him into a fit! At any rate, it was worth the $4.97!

Friday, June 17, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On 54 Ladybugs
~
As I was sitting at my computer The Girl approached me with, "Close your eyes I have a surprise for you". I closed my eyes and waited for her usual butterfly kiss or hug. I waited. She has a cold so I could hear her breathing through her mouth. I waited more. She told me this was going to take a long time but to be patient. More mouth breathing and the occasional sniffle. I could feel her hair brush my cheek as she leaned in front on me over and over again. She was obviously excited about what she was doing. She told me several times, " You are going to love this". I could hear paper rumpling and more sniffling. I waited for about 5 minutes with my eyes closed while she finished whatever it was she was doing. Finally she excitedly told me to open my eyes. When I did she I saw my monitor decorated around the perimeter with her favourite lady bug stickers. 54 to be exact. We counted them. What a wonderful gift from the heart. I know she loved her stickers and had been saving them for a special occasion. They will be on there until I replace the monitor. Every time I look at it now I will think of her thoughtful gift and be thankful for her.
~~~~~
On Housework
~
I have been so busy the last few days. Things sort of fell apart here when I was getting ready for the relay and also having to work on my days off. My place is never really messy. It is also never really clean. I don't like spending time doing housework! I would rather spend my time off with my kids. You have probably read the little poem of "Cleaning and scrubbing can wait 'til tomorrow, for babies grow up we've learned to our sorrow...". I have tried to take that as my motto and let my place get messy. I forsake washing the kitchen floor in order to spend time with my kids. When my kids are at school and I am off I spend that time running around so I can spend time with my kids when they come home. My time with them is already all too short. They are growing up fast and my heart aches to know my time with them is not forever.

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait 'til tomorrow,
For babies grow up, we learned to our sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep,
I'm rocking my babies because babies don't keep.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Buying A Bra
~
I actually went and had myself fitted for a bra last week. While walking down the mall in search of stamps I saw the s#xy lingerie store. So I went in. Working in the store were 2 or 3 teenagers who have not yet experienced the force of gravity. Nor had they nursed two children.
Let me digress. At one point my girls were perky. They were fun! I nursed my son for 13 months and my daughter for 2.5 years. After that I lost 60 pounds. After that the girls just gave up. I was quite annoyed that they didn't even try to remain something of their former self.
So I am standing their in the shop and a salesgirl asked me if I needed help. Skip ahead to the dressing room. Salesgirl has about 80 bras for me to try on. After trying on a few dozen bras she said, "Lady, I am sorry but their is no bra in the world that is going to help those sorry excuse for tits." Ok, those weren't her exact words but I could tell by the look on her face. It was time to bring out the heavy artillery. Underwire. With formed cups. I put it on and the girls fell into them. Like jello being dumped into a bowl. The underwire holding hard and fast. I decided to wear this one out. And never take it off again. Ever.
~~~~
On Too Much Excitement for One Day!
~
I went to the mailbox today and guess what was there? Hold on to your hats because I, yes I am now a member of the National Geographic Society! Just so you can see for yourself here is my certificate only given to members! Included in my membership is a magazine subscription! I only had to pay $33.00. I am just so much better than everyone now!
30 minutes on the mini trampoline.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
One of you asked how I motivate myself to exercise. Motivating oneself to exercise can be one the toughest things you can do or the easiest. If I was asked to go for a run or play a competitive sport like baseball or basketball I will do everything to avoid exercise! If I am doing something I love it is easy. The things I love to do are swimming, jump roping, bike riding and bouncing on my mini trampoline. Hula Huping is fun too! I can easily bounce on the mini trampoline for 30 minutes everyday. I just put on Friends or Seinfeld and bounce until the show is over. If you mean to "start going to the gym" but hate it, likely you won't last.

I got a huge amount done today! Had a court date. Ex now has to pay me $200 less every month. It is going to make it very tough to make it but I know I can. I also filed a bunch of receipts and forms that were supposed to be done a long time ago. It is a good feeling to get things done that I had not had a chance to get to.

Kids are almost out of school. Tomorrow is a trip to the beach! And I am not working! Day off! Whooo hooooo! I love spending time with my kids. They are the best!

30 minutes on the mini trampoline

Monday, June 13, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
On Weight Loss
I have a problem with food. I don't eat because I am bored, lonely, sad or depressed. I eat because I like to eat! I love food! I love all kinds of food. So when all the dieting experts ask us to ask ourselves why we eat I don't have a deep unknown demon I am wrestling. I just love to eat. I have tried to keep at a decent weight but I can't when I want to eat the contents of fridge and cupboard. So I have decided to increase my physical activity from (cough) nothing to 30 minutes a day. I have done it in the past and I actually really enjoy being active. So you all have to help! If you see the above ticker disappear one day it means I gave up. So make sure you ride my ass if it does! I would like to point out I did not choose the ticker made of little pieces of pie. That's a start! Mmmm. Bumbleberry pie...
I have a big job ahead of me!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On Being Bald.
When I first decided to shave my head I was concerned. What was I going to look like? What if I hated it? Would I have to call in sick for the next month until it grew out? Well I didn't have to worry about any of those things. I love it! It feels fantastic and I don't have to do a thing to it in the morning. I have had everyone compliment on it! So, I have decided to keep it this way for the summer! I feel so liberated with this new hairdo. I recommend everyone at least try going bald at least once. It's great!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On Smoking
I can't believe I did not mention it in my previous post about potential suitors. (See June 7 & 8) but Christine over at Mommy Matters reminded me of something. I will never, ever not in a million years and not if he was the last man on earth date a smoker. I think it is vile and disgusting and it causes cancer. (You all know how I feel about cancer!) Moreover, I am deathly allergic to cigarette smoke and spent a great deal of time in the hospital and money for inhalers and steriod medications because of cigarette smoke. I hate it. And I don't apologize to all the smokers out there I may have offended. Smoking is offensive. So quit! So there!
~~
I know many of my lovely readers do smoke. I DO love all of YOU though!
~~~~
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
~~
Just not the cigarettes.
25 minutes on the mini-trampoline

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
The relay is over. We walked in pouring rain. I am now bald. Pictures to come. Very tired this morning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And now the pictures. It was pouring so my makeup is all running down and smudged on my face! You can see in the first picture where my hair was. It was just past my shoulders.



Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


It was amazing! I had hundreds of people cheering for me. I am SO glad I did it. It feels great and I just may keep it this was for the summer!

Than you to all of you for you wonderful comments. It has meant so much. In total I raised $1, 400 for the Canadian Cancer Society. It is worth every hair on my head!

Friday, June 10, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
When I think on the words people have used to describe me I know that they do not fit. Making the decision to shave my head was an easy one. But the words like brave, bold and courageous do not describe me. They don't. When my mom was diagnosed with cancer I lay on my bed crying like I had never had before. I begged God to spare her life. Why? Because I needed her still. Brave? Hardly. More like cowardly. I remember lying curled up and clinging to a stuffed bunny she gave me when I was pregnant with my daughter. Courageous? No way. Scared beyond belief that my mom was going to die and I was going to have to say goodbye to my best friend. The decision to shave my head was easy because cancer struck my family twice this year. It stole my Nana away from me and it hit my mom. It has hit your families as well. I know we must find a cure. The words that speak positive attributes don't belong to me. They belong to the people that are living with cancer and still get up each day with a smile; the people that allow toxins to be pumped into their body in the name of wellness. They belong to those out there that go each day for radiation; and the people that bravely allow they to be the "guinea pigs" for new treatments. This is why I am doing it. We need to continue to work our way to a cure.
~~~~~~
To make a donation to the Canadian Cancer Society click here.
~~~~~
To make a donation to the American Cancer Society click here.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Well I see the post was popular with my female readers! Hmmm, no comments yet from the men. At any rate, I was just getting started. However, some of you mentioned about it easier to know what I don't want. I actually do know what I want!

Future dateable man will ...

love my kids like they were his own, be able to laugh, realize he is never going to be # 1 in my life because my kids are, like to spend time with my family (because they are wonderful, caring and genuine people), like cats, understand when I want to spend a night by myself, love the library, and never want to stop learning, be content to spend the night at home, clean up after himself, love his family, believe in Santa, Easter Bunny and wishing on stars, hold doors for me, like classical music (or at least not make fun of me when I listen to it), teach me all the cool things that he knows, eat vegetables, take vitamins, go see a doctor annually, take good care of his body, be able to cook an entire meal, love camping, like to feed the ducks, take in stray animals and find good homes for them, know what making love is, not laugh at my bald head, like my tattoo, like Seinfeld and will watch reruns with me, hate that women are being exploited s#xually and never suggest we watch p*rn together, be a good driver, shower everyday, wear deodorant, keep his house clean but not so clean it looks like a show home, like live theatre, make going to the grocery store a date, know some days I need space, love me if I get MS, Cancer, Alzheimers or ALS. And will still love me when all the fireworks and stars are gone and we are both saggy, slow and feeble.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

A glass of wine (or 2) can do lots on a girl's outlook on life and so I come up with my new dating profile if I was to ever go back on Lavelife or Match.com (which I won't).

I am not interested in your sorry ass if you...

live with your mom, do drugs, drink too much, don't own a vehicle, are out of work (other than for health reasons), eat fast food more than once a week, treat you mom like shit, don't pay child support, want me to swallow, have long hair, will let your dog watch us have s#x, don't say please or thank you, don't hold doors for old people, ignore your kids, watch lots of TV, are into thr##somes (sorry I am not b!s#xual), are into "dom!nating" me, want me to "dom!nate" you, are always late, don't take care of your body and eat crap all the time, have anger issues, have a prison record, think you are God's gift to women, want to spend every waking minute with me (I need space!), live in a pig sty, are mean to animals, think it is ok to go see another woman for the weekend while you are dating me even if you are just friends, lie, steal, want me to serve you dinner after I have worked all day, don't want kids, have a problem with spirituality, are rude to waitresses and don't tip. Furthermore, you better be able to handle a woman that "knows what she wants" (Note- that term seems to be a favorite among men in dating profiles) because I know what I want! So don't piss me off because I will dump your sorry ass because I am very happy with the person I am. It took forever but I am never going to change for anyone (not just a man) again.

Oh yeah. You better like bald women becuase I am going to be one.

Note-The above post may or may not reflect the true feelings of Barbara. Her kids are away for the night and she has had a little to much wine.

Monday, June 06, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
It is odd the things we do when we are in a relationship. I did something when I met Kevin formerly known as boyfriend. I cut off contact with a guy that I met online 2 years before I even met .

I met BJ in a Yahoo game room. It wasn't a "chat room" but for some reason we started up a conversation that night. We became good friends. We talked on messenger and had the occasional phone call. BJ was there for me through some of the most difficult days of my life and I was there for him. (He lost his girlfriend a year prior to meningitis.) We didn't talk a lot, maybe 2 or 3 times a month. We laughed, cried, flirted and goofed off.
When I met the former boyfriend I felt I needed to tell him about my relationship with BJ. The former boyfriend was convinced BJ had a thing for me. So I stopped e mailing BJ. This is not a post to bash the former boyfriend. I am a woman who makes her own decisions and I made the decision to push BJ aside. It was a wrong decision.
A couple nights ago I had a very vivid dream about BJ and I woke up feeling very sad because I had burned a bridge. I never thought I would find him again but I sent him an e mail to an old address. He wrote back within 3 hours. He had missed me too.
I regret the decision I made because BJ and I have always been and will always be kindred spirits. I have never met him in person but our spirits are connected in a deep and true friendship.
I am thankful that God has allowed him to become a part of my life and I will never push him away again.

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
We all have these days. I woke up this morning tired and just wanting to go back to bed. I wandered around the house and saw all the laundry that needed to be done and how messy my garbage can was (see my profile) and knew I needed to stay up. Bah!

The relay is now only 5 days away! But I am too tired today to be excited.


And later in the day...

I just woke up from a nap of sorts and I am feeling better. Any parent knows that you can't nap when you have kids. Why? One of two things.


1. They are being too loud and keep you awake.


2. They are being too quiet and you are wondering why they are so quiet.


But I do feel more rested. Still in my pajamas and it is 5:20. Think I will just stay in them
.

Friday, June 03, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
To date I have raised $1, 250 for the Canadian Cancer Society! One week tonight until I get my head shaved!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Large bags of garbage from the 70's and 80's.

I found some of it today. I had forgot it was there so when I stumbled across it was a very ugly discovery. It started with my son's track and field day. He didn't want to go because he isn't "a fast enough runner". (his words.) That's when I found the garbage. It was in bags called insecurity, low self-worth and self-esteem. I had quite forgot it was there shoved way back in the closet of my mind. I did't know what to say to my son so I asked him if he wanted to stay home. He said he didn't because his team needed him. So I sent him off this morning with words of encouragement and to just have fun. When I picked him up I could tell it had not gone well. He was feeling awful. I asked him how the day went and he said he didn't get a single ribbon. I had a long chat with him about some people are really good at some things while others are better at others. These are the things I found out while growing up that I didn't know when I was his age. And trust me, it's true. My son is excellent in Tae Kwon Do and has natural ability. He was reading at a 4th grade level in grade 1. He is also a true humanitarian. The most generous of spirits. So he doesn't excel at track and field. No big deal right? Right. But to a 9 year old it is a big deal and I don't know how to show him this lesson. I don't want him to struggle with the same feelings of worthlessness that I did at his age. At the end of the conversation I told him that running really fast was only ever going to be important if he was being chased by a great big dog and the dog was going to bite his butt. He laughed. I really hope he understood what I was trying to tell him. And that he wont find the same bags of garbage in the back of his closet when he is my age.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Kvetch. Kvetch. Kvetch. Kvetch. Kvetch. Kvetch.
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Going into work on your day off sucks. That is how I spent yet another day off. I am getting really tired of doing it but I never actually say no when I am asked. When the owner comes up to my desk and asks me to work (so she can have a day off) it isn't easy to say no. This woman has fired people for lesser offences. So in I went hoping to catch up on filing invoices but the general manager asked me if I had an hour to spare. I didn't, but said sure. She gave me a mammoth sized filing job. It took me over 4 hours just to get my head around it and make a very small and insignificant dent. Then other co-workers are getting pissed off at me for following through with something the manager told me not to do this morning. All damn day I was asked to page a certain employee but the manager said he was not to be disturbed and all the other coworkers got pissed off at me! It wasn't my fucking idea to allow his phone to be on do not disturb all freaking day!

Anyway, it was a shit day. I am tired. Nobody should be allowed to go into work and spend the whole fucking day on do not disturb! When this happens at the place I work for you are not even allowed to ask then a simple question. Fucking stooooopid.

Anyway. Kvetch is over. Your turn. Tell me about the stupid rules at your workplace. Or anything else that is pissing you off.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Just a quick hello tonight. I have to work tomorrow on my day off (again) so I am running around like a mad thing.

I just hit $1000.00 for my head shave. Can you believe it!? I am overwhelmed.



----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com

I can't sleep. I could have a glass of wine or an ativan but neither appeals so here I am. And what am I going to write about? Daddy Long Legs. Do you have any idea how much I love these spiders? They have to be the cutest spider around. Even their name makes me smile. Go ahead. Say "Daddy Long Legs" and try not to smile. They walk around on legs as thin as a piece of hair and that cute little ball for a body. I remember being about 3 and sitting under the back stairs where I would play with them. (Yes, perhaps I was an odd little girl.) I never did the typical childhood game of pulling off the legs. I would just sit and let them crawl on my hand and then set them free again. As an adult I am a big fan of spiders. Yes, some of them are ugly but they can't help it. They are amazing creatures. If I see one in my home I do one of two things. I watch it for a while then go about my life or I catch it, show it to my kids then set her free outside where I know she will be happy.

Does anyone else love spiders? Please tell me I am not the only one!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com




< Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosting by Photobucket